(slightly) tl;dr
The Motherly Instinct
I don’t know if I’ve always had this instinct, but recently it’s been ridiculously strong with an increase in the number of alcohol-inclusive parties I attend.
Basically, I have this crazy urge to look after people my age; my friends, namely if they’re hurt, sick or drunk. I hold the buckets. I wet the terry cloths when someone’s got a fever. I fetch the bandages and the gauze tape. If someone’s distressed while they’re drunk, I’ll try to talk about other things, sit them down and make sure they’re comfortable.
I don’t know what drives me, but I think it’s something to do with this unconditional-love complex I’ve found myself in this year. There’s a high to it and something special about looking after friends who need it. I’m not good when people are really upset, but hurt, sick or drunk, just say the name.
Sometimes it gets out of control and I get stressed, especially if I’m one of very few sober kids. Eventually I’m rendered useless and I cry, laugh and cry at the same time, scream and sometimes end up getting violent. Basically I give in to the atmosphere, just without alcohol. It ends badly. It always ends badly.
If there are enough sober people around, I completely thrive on the holding-buckets stuff. No matter how much I complain, I love it. Don’t ask me why, I can’t tell you because I don’t know why myself yet.
You do it because they’re your friends, because you care about them. You put your own views (re: drinking, which I admire and respect) aside because somebody else needs your assistance.
It’s an entirely natural, human instinct.
Notes
